Mixed up thoughts

I do lay in bed sometimes thinking about what I want to write on here. No, life isn't that boring, but writing an entry is important to me to just keep track of things.
Now last night the show 'Super Nanny' really annoyed the hell out of me. I mean, how can some kids be so awful? I majored in Early Childhood Education in college and was around dozens of kiddos and there were a few stand-outs along the way. After I got a job in a daycare center I really had to be the nanny of sorts. This one place operated totally off the rules in my opinion. I lasted there 3 weeks. They started leaving me alone for 3 or 4 hours with about sixteen 2-yr olds. Me, alone changing diapers of the ones who weren't potty trained. Alone again listening to this one girl scream as soon as her head went down on the cot for naptime. I will not forget Stephanie. The only child who when she did fall asleep, fell asleep with her eyes open. And my hand did go over her mouth once, couldn't help it-only for a few seconds then I felt terrible. I love kids so much, but can't spend hours at a time with so many of them. It was so hard.
So then this morning mom mentioned John. John, one of the nicest people I have ever met and will never forget after 15 yrs. of saying good-bye to him. Ok, we went to college together and then John worked with my mom (she was a receptionist/secretary) at a home for women. I believe he was a speech therapist there. I was married and had Sean when the two of them worked together. He had changed a bunch from college. He use to look like Tim Matheson in Animal House-but got a Doug Henning look. He told mom he would never marry, so we both knew what that meant. He comforted my mom when a fellow worker committed suicide. Held mom's hand throughout the service for her. So, maybe someday our paths will cross, but in the meantime, I will think of him lovingly. Not sure if he ever thinks about mom or me. But he left a lasting impression on me.